“Change is never more evident or inevitable than when a woman organizes the furniture in her home. Man is never more useful than in the moments when these changes are taking place if he moves the furniture without expressing an opinion or at least mutters it so that it cannot be heard.”
This week a pair of birds began building a nest between the screen and windows of our bedroom in our 1930s home. It has been fun to watch both of them working so hard bringing leaves and twigs back to their nest. The nest has grown and is a work of art. It is amazing how birds instinctively just know how to do this. I can say for sure that two in the window is better than one in the bush!
I wish I understood bird speak. We have heard them chirping and singing while staying extremely busy and productive. Being a guy, I just have to wonder who is in charge of the operation and are they getting along or fighting through the whole process. I do not know if this is their first nest they have built together or if they stay together as a couple, year after year, and they have done it multiple times before. If they have done this before and the male is not a bird brain, I would expect that the chirping and singing would mostly be coming from the female and that the male’s responses would be mostly “yes ma’am” and “got it” etc. Perhaps I am taking a big leap here but I am comfortable when I say I am sure the male bird was not tweeting the following four things:
*Honey, why do you want the nest here? It is so much nicer over there by that tree. Can’t we just move it over there?
* Tweetheart, don’t you think that is enough…I mean we practically raked the guys yard to get building materials…don’t you think we have enough?
* Tweety, that leaf is not going to look good there…why did you move it?…I just put it there!
* You keep working my little chickiepoo…I am going to hang out at the bird feeder with the crows and blue jays just to keep the pulse on the neighborhood…see you later tonight.
No…this male bird just worked and worked. If he was pouting, I could not detect it. He just instinctively or through a learned behavior got in line. We can all learn something from this.
Men, the nest is not our nest. The home is not our home. We work to help pay for it and we work in the yard to make it look pretty but we are invited guests in the home. Muffle your opinions on what goes where, whether it is furniture, pictures or rugs. You only have so many debates you can win and if you are going to have an argument and the choice of topics is rugs or hugs, choose hugs…duh! Your job is to install and then wait and reinstall at another location when asked to do so. It is really quite simple once you get the hang of it. Instead of uttering “are you sure” all day long, just say “I got it” and do it.
You will find that you will be able to enter the nest more frequently and spend more happy moments once in the nest if you remember that you have a purpose to serve and it does not include expressing an opinion during nesting.
It’s not all bad though for the male bird. Once the eggs come and she is sitting on them, he can go and hang out wherever he wants. But wait…my bird speak is getting better and I seem to understand the conversation that takes place at that point…tweet tweet…what’s that…I have to go find some worms? Are you kidding me?…tweet tweet…and I have to sit on the eggs too?… Wait a minute, I thought I was done once the nest was built!…tweet tweet…oh I can be done if I want…just no nesting time for me…dang! Wait, I can see those humans through that window and I don’t understand human speak but it looks like he must have expressed his opinion about their nest too. Hasn’t he learned anything?
I wonder if he would like to go hang out at the bird bath with me? That way we could do some male bonding and also see who shows up…you know…kill two birds with one stone…
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